New nobility
The Rise of the Cryptocrats
Move over PayPal mafia, the crypto court has arrived. Meet the new digital aristocracy.
On Monday, January 21st, 2025, President Donald Trump signed the order to free Silk Road Ross Ulbricht from his double life sentences—for creating an “Etsy for narcotics” startup. Now 40, the “Dread Pirate Roberts” is officially “Freed Pirate Roberts.”
The prodigal son of crypto has returned to a vastly different landscape than the one he left in 2013. One where crypto exchanges have corner offices instead of servers in basements. And now all those who were jamming in the basement have a big seat at the table.
In the future, the buzzy names on everyone’s lips won’t be Elon, Thiel, or Bezos—those robber barons are so 2010. The people we’ll be talking about are Vitali, Armstrong, Lee, and Ulbricht.
Meet Tyler and Cameron Winklevoss, who transformed themselves from Facebook might-have-beens to crypto definitely-ares. After their famous FB settlement, they pulled off perhaps the greatest pivot since Bitcoin itself—becoming the world’s first Bitcoin billionaire twins. They’re the Koch brothers of crypto—if the Koch brothers spent more time discussing blockchain governance and posting memes.
At 42, these six foot five inch identical brothers—worth about $4 billion at crypto’s peak—have perfected the art of failing upward. After losing Facebook to Zuckerberg (you’ve seen the movie), they invested heavily in the original cryptocurrency which made them enough to become early Bitcoin whales. They’ve gone from Olympic athletes to crypto evangelists—although they still probably tell people about their rowing days within five minutes of meeting them.
Recently ditching Manhattan’s concrete jungle for Austin’s tech scene, the twins have been running the Gemini exchange since 2014—when they’re not busy being the world’s most sophisticated copy-paste meme. Tyler (older by eight minutes, in case you’re at a dinner party with them) and Cameron maintain their bachelor status, although both have been linked to various supermodels. And both are known for their clean-cut image in the often scruffy crypto world: think Wall Street meets Palo Alto meets yacht club.
Having just settled their lawsuit with the CFTC for $5 million, we’re sure they’ll have lots of time on their hands to network with their other crypto friends—as well as maintain their personal trainers.
Meet Brian Armstrong, the $11.2 billion man who dresses like he’s headed to a Python coding meetup. As Coinbase‘s CEO and largest shareholder (proud owner of 34.8 million shares), he’s mastered the art of looking like he shops at Gap while playing in the financial big leagues.
The tech monk of crypto got hitched in October 2024 to Angela Meng, a former investment banker and journalist, putting to rest those old rumors about Indonesian actress Raline Shah.
In true Armstrong fashion, he’s not just trying to disrupt money—he also co-founded NewLimit, a biotech company working on extending human lifespans. Because apparently revolutionizing global finance wasn’t enough of a side hustle.
Known for his “no politics at work” stance in 2020, Armstrong offered employees a choice: keep the social activism for Twitter or take a severance package.
Between signing the Giving Pledge (promising to donate most of his wealth) and founding GiveCrypto.org, he’s trying to prove that crypto bros can have hearts too. But what really sets him apart is how he’s managed to build an empire while maintaining the vibe of someone who might help you set up your printer.
When Coinbase went public in 2021, Armstrong proved that sometimes the quietest guy in the room really is the most dangerous—to traditional banking, at least. He’s turned Coinbase into the Switzerland of crypto companies: neutral, professional, and really good with money.
Meet Charles Hoskinson, the buffalo-ranching crypto philosopher king who’s worth a cool $500-600 million. At 36, he runs IOHK from his Colorado ranch, where he apparently splits his time between raising buffalo and raising eyebrows in the crypto community and indulging in his favorite new pastime, falconry. Like any good crypto soap opera star, Hoskinson comes with his own controversy starter pack: a mysterious, unfinished PhD in Number Theory (spoiler: he never actually completed it); a dramatic exit from Ethereum at age 25 (he wanted to go profit, they went non-profit); and enough spicy social media takes to make Elon Musk look diplomatic.
In 2021, he managed to turn a Cardano YouTube discussion into a proposal to his fiancée. When he’s not getting engaged on livestreams, you might find him playing chess, ranting about monetary systems, or telling anyone who’ll listen that Bitcoin is a “dumpster fire” (his words, not ours).
The man who once dreamed of solving the Riemann hypothesis now solves the equally complex problem of running a ranch while building a blockchain empire. His leadership style? Imagine a mathematical cowboy with a YouTube channel and a penchant for public debates. He’s what you’d get if you combined a TED Talk speaker with a Twitter warrior—and gave them a buffalo farm.
Meet Vitalik Buterin, born in 1994 in Russia before emigrating to Canada, who rocketed to crypto-fame as the wunderkind co-founder of Ethereum at the ripe age of 19. Known for his almost otherworldly demeanor, rail-thin physique, and penchant for wearing cat-themed t-shirts, Buterin has become something of a crypto prophet figure who seems more comfortable discussing mathematical proofs and blockchain governance than engaging in typical tech CEO theatrics. Despite sitting on a theoretical fortune in ETH, he maintains a relatively modest lifestyle and is known for his philosophical writings on quadratic funding, tech utopianism, and effective altruism.
Buterin’s claim to fame rests on conceptualizing Ethereum as a “world computer” that could run decentralized applications beyond simple currency transactions—essentially creating the platform that launched a thousand DAOs (and probably just as many crypto scams). While Bitcoin’s creator remained anonymous, Buterin became the very visible face of crypto’s second generation, for better or worse, bringing both legitimacy and his particular brand of eccentric brilliance to the space.
Meet Charlie Lee, Litecoin‘s creator and crypto’s answer to the younger sibling who actually made it big, famously selling all his Litecoin at the peak of 2017’s bull run. He created what people called “silver to Bitcoin’s gold,” so-called because of the faster processing and lower fees, making it practical for everyday transactions, while Bitcoin tends to be used more as a store of value and larger investments.
Unlike the nobles of old, who inherited their titles through birthright, these crypto royals earned their positions through a combination of coding prowess, prescient timing, and the ability to explain blockchain to venture capitalists without making their eyes glaze over.
As this digital dynasty continues to evolve, one can only wonder who will join their ranks next.
Hero photo of Charles Hoskinson, CC0, via Wikimedia Commons